Today, I decided to look through your archive. Just out of curiosity. Just out of fun. But what started as a excited, wishful feeling eventually evolved into one whereby the sinking realisation of my actions towards you all these months caused the tear ducts to crank into motion after having been inactive for 2 months.

Why the hell was I so blind all this while? I didn't just kill myself. I killed you, emotionally and psychologically. I knew the truth, but I forced it away. Deep down, I lied to myself so damn much that for a while, I actually started to live that lie.

And yet you still forced yourself to remain stoic. Remain solid despite all that you had to face. Your mental strength is amazing. Because I wouldn't have been able to do that.

I'm sorry. So freaking sorry. This has got to be the greatest, and most sincere apology I've ever made in my life, probably. And yes, I know that I'm going to have to tell you this in person, but right now, the realisation that just hit me is... astounding.