Catharsis.

Total disgust.

My MYE results. What. The. Hell. La. 

How am I going to get into the university at this rate? 

It's times like this when I feel I bit off more than I could chew. By going into a JC. I should have just gone to a poly right from the beginning. That would have saved a considerable amount of tears. 

But then again, had I gone into a poly, I wouldn't have grown up ( as a friend of mine said), I wouldn't have matured ( again, what my friend said) and I wouldn't have make all those mistakes for which I learnt valuable lessons from. 

Can't get out of the system. Like a certain friend of mine said, DON'T EVEN EFFING THINK OF LEAVING JC AND GOING TO A POLY AFTER As. Because the moment that thought creeps into your mind, you're dead. Gone. It becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. 

I don't care what you do, Julyn. Don't you dare disappoint your teachers and your parents who have pinned so much hopes on you. You will go to a university in Singapore ( preferably NUS) because you have done well enough in your A levels to do so. Which means somehow getting your Us and Es to Bs and even As. Revise. Throw yourself into work. Practise until you collapse from exhaustion. No choice. Bo bian. ( And I am strangely starting to sound like one of my best friends. This is amusing, but cool in some really weird way too. )

And also, thanks to said friend of mine who has boosted me with much motivation since time immemorial, as well as all my other friends willing to help me out there. 

I'm gonna do the IJ girl thing and say, love you all :)