Crying, and why we do that

This is what i've realised: Different people look at different things in different ways. Ok. Say for people like us, we dont think too much when we cry in front of others, esp, if the other party is a girl. More often than not, we're likely to gain a little bit of sympathy from them. i mean, tears are the universal sign of sadness. We hope to gain sympathy and comfort from it, to the extent that it almost becomes an obsession. i've read that humans will cry when there is no other possible way out. Its so different. I mean, generally when guys see someone crying they think," OMG crybaby" , but when girls see the same thing they say," OMG poor thing.."IDK. hai.

ermm....

OMG. Rmb the toilets in China? OMG OMG OMG. I think they beat the record seriously. they were out of this world. Like, we went to the CCTV studios where shows with olden time scenes where filmed, the toilet was a drainage system, and had stable doors.. you know those which you can peep over... someone did... OMG..

saying goodbye? idk.....

SIgh. Iam back. so sian. school's starting way too soon. I miss the weather there. seriously i mean here we go into the shopping centre to cool down. There we go into the shopping centre to warm up. The photo was taken while i was in a boat on the erm, 3rd day? it was the Yiwu cruise. went to woozy( sorry wuxi) on the 5th day.. the pearl factory, which was good but all the guys were pretty bored..cant blame them:)I managed to take a few funny photos of the direct translation from chinese to english, cant post them now.. its in the camera:( but one was written : ( in chinese) xiao xin de hua ( in english) be careful of landslide. i mean, de=land, hua=slide. :)

I realise that its a hundred times harder to say goodbye to someone when u know its almost impossible that you'll see them again..We know the usual sayings," We'll keep in touch!" and the usual exchange of phone numbers or email addresses only provides the psychological comfort of not losing each other entirely. But as time goes by we soon realise that it becomes harder and harder to comply with what one has said to the other, and soon the words are forgetten. I think the hardest of all is when friends are made on a short term notice, eg. holiday, because we dont see each other on a day to day basis. I think it really is because once the duration of the tour is over, we end up saying goodbye and shedding hot tears over the seperation of friendship.

As the saying goes, it takes two hands to clap. therefore, it takes 2 to keep a friendship. one person can we enthusiastic but if the other person doesnt quite keep up, the friendship can be broken as easily a cotton thread. Iam not saying that all friendships dont turn out well. Some do, and i realise its because apart from the fact that we dont meet each other all the time. Aiya. i hope this one turnes out though. I really do...

Oh man. Iam repeating myself. aiya iam talking crap la. better end off before i say more crap. sigh........

GReetings from Shanghai!:)

Yo.:) guess where iam now. Iam in shanghai using the hotel com. OMG OMG OMG. SO awfully cold. 0 degrees. Oh and from what my tour guide said, the milk here is safe? IDk. TOok the maglev train. Went to Su zhou. a lot of temple s and a river. then today,went to xi tang water town. took a boat to the village. its super old i tell u. unlike the modern city... hai. every single dinner and lunch is the same... a dinner with a lazy susan. just food... oh and i tried the chou dou fu. the specialty i guess. not chou at all. I like the smell in fact. haiya. damn cold. I have to stir the milo to dissolve with a toothbrush. Toilet can see through. :0I think iam goin to bed now. 8.30pm. sigh. more again when iam back. bye:)

:)

Yay:) leaving for the airport in 2 hours time:)

:) just for fun...

Yo:) haha iam back:) Just for fun:)

Screenshots of my character in EO.

Photo on left: Iam the one in the red christmas hat near the statue:)

photo on the right: there's only one character..

Ooh iam leaving for Shanghai on the 14th Midnight( or is that 15?) haha..

Sigh. Physics book sucks. Chemistry even worse. Sigh. Aiya. This is life. I MUST GET USED TO IT. GRRRRRRR.

:D

HI! Haha... Iam happy.. so happy. My appeal succeeded! :D Now in 3/6. Hahaha... Ok. Estelle was in 3/8 with me but now we've both managed to appeal out-Estelle's in 3/7 though:( anyway..Yay:) Sigh. Better work hard. haha. BYEE:)

QUIZ!

YO. HAHa. Guess what? I stopping tuition. Together with Yi. Sorry Rachel:D Keep in touch via MSN, will u? Haha. ok. Eh, rachel I've stolen your quiz:) sorry about that but imitation is the sincerest form of flattery:D

1) What color is your phone?
White, But it used to be red...:)


2) Who's the first person who comes up under the letter M?
Mum, LOL


3) Who's the last person you called?

Mu mum,Haha, to pick me from the bus stop cos it was pitch dark out.

4) Who was your last missed call from?
Averil:D


5) Who's the 2nd person who miss called?
Mum, I think? If iam not wrong...


6) Who's speed dial 2?
No one. But I've just put Averil as the no. 2 speed dial:)


7) Who's the 3rd person who comes up under J?
Omg. I..I only kinda saved her name in cos I was doing the drama project.Its Jini.


8) Who was your last received call?
My mum,probably. It says 'no number' cos my home no. is private:P



9) Who was your second last received call?
Averil. Thats for sure:)


10) What is your wallpaper?
erm, One where there are a few butterflies and flowers... its a theme:)


11) What is your screensaver?
Same, also from theme:)


12)How many text messages you received?
1198 is what is recorded. Cos i didnt clear for 3-4 months. :)


13) What's the 5th message say in your inbox?
Erm.. Must I say?! Haha. Its from Averil:) iam not going to say for fear of a black eye again:D.jkjk


14) Who was your last text message from?
Averil again:)


15) What is your alarm sound?
What's that? SMS ring tone? Its MSN messenger sound.


16) What is your handphone ringtone?
SMack dat!



17) Name every person you have text messages from.
Whoa, that's a lot. Averil, Mavis, Mum, Crystal, Cherie, Stephenie, Estelle, Shermaine, CAthy,
CHeryl Tang.My cousin,Eugenia, Elizabeth,Phyllis,Shimona,Tessa,Yi chuan......etc. A lot lah:)


18) Have you seen the 101 Chuck Norris facts?
One word: HUH?!


19) Who's the 3rd person on your U?
Uncle frank.


20) What does the 3rd message in your outbox say?
It says, ' there are no messages in your outbox folder'


21) Who is the first name in your phonebook?
Averil again:)


22) Who is the last name in your Phonebook?
Yi chuan! :)


23) Last 4 digits of your number?6857. haha. Averil's is 1694, mavis is 0390:)


24) Starhub/M1/Singtel?
Singtel:)

Stuff...

Went for some CIP at SGH with Averil yesterday. We started with the delivery of papers to different rooms, then some ripping of paper, chopping of papers, then stapling. Weird I tell u. Haha. anyway, I did learn sth, and that is,I love chops no more.

REsults of appeal on monday. Iam so scared...I hate disappointing my parents, even more than I hate disappointing myself. Sigh. What a mess.

What if I just fell off a building and died? That way I wont be disappointing anyone. No iam not suicidle.But I know I cant. How sad...

...

SIGH..........

20 years later...

Iam appealing for a transfer of classes. Hope I can. What went wrong i wonder. I did study. I did!!!!!!! WHY?! I dont understand the logic of it all.. Why cant i be as good as others, when they do well, SO CAN I!!!!!!! I CAN DO IT!!!!!! I MUST BELEVE I CAN!!!!!!!!!! BELIEVE AND I WILL SUCCEED!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now I seriously wonder what people thought of me during th time in class lol. Bet they think its nothing to be crying over the results. But this is real!! this is going to affect my future!! WHAt was i thinking? I bet they all felt awkward lol....Imagine this scenario...

20years have passed...

( i walk into a doctors clinic)
(knock knock)
Averil: Come in...
Me: Good morning Doctor Deng...
Averil:Sit down...What's the problem?
Me: Iam not sure.. see I have a persistant flu..
Averil:patient's name...hey that sounds familiar...
Me: your name sounds familiar too..
Averil: I cant believe it! you're my childhood friend!
Me: What?! really?! wow! You've changed alot!
Averil: so have you...
( the usual hugging, and the next thing you know Averil has caught my flu.. haha...)

Me(gushing): I cant believe you've made and become such a successful doctor!
Averil: thank you! and what are u working as, may I know?
Me: well, i..i..iam just a..a archiect...
Averil: that's great!
Me: but its not as a high paying job as yours...
Averil: wasnt that what you've always wanted?
Me: ya but...
Averil: Lets check you over, shall we?
(nurse walks in, briskly hands Averil a bag)
(a pause)
Averil: there we go. You're done. Its just the common flu.
Me: thank you. See you again soon.
Averil: goodbye, and dont forget to take your prescription on the way out.
Me(closing door): bye...

I hope u like this monologe. HAHA. Laugh away:) Hopefully averil wont give me a black eye for wrting this:)

SIgh

SIgh...i got nothing to say. Cried myself sick. Life is complicated right now..:'(

photo of US!

Haha. Here we go. from left: Averil, Mavis and I. Mavis is super photogenic. HAha.
Oh, and i didnt upload the other photo cos of camera shake. sigh. but i guess both averil and mavis looked good, except that I wasnt looking at the camera.:(

teachers, and the big part they play in a student's life

I don't really know what to say, or do now. I can't believe it. The bombshell just dropped-Miss Ho has resigned! I only found out late last night and i woke up this morning wondering if it was just a dream. To think that I didn't even mention a word about it during the exhibition and was just telling her what I thought of my artwork on the wall, like everything was normal.Wrong. It was not.

Then She sent me some message asking me to continue drawing,imagining and creating. I thought that she wasn't going to be teaching us next year. Wrong again. She's leaving for good. I guess she was one of the nicest teachers i've ever met, someone i could really talk to without feeling awkward. SIGH. All the best for your future and may God bless you always:)

Then comes the second bombshell, but this applies to everyone. Not really a bombshell, more like a a ticking time bomb. Mrs Wong won't be teaching us. SIgh again. I mean, ok, she goes beyond the level of studies and brings it down to a more personal level. I guess she understands what we all are going through, and is probably the teacher who affected me the most this year( in terms of grades and etc.) SOmehow, you can tell when a teacher really is compassionate about her job or not. From the conversation, (which included Mrs Wong, my mum and I ) She said that she 'loved her job too much to want to stay in Perth'. Bet other teachers don't have the desire to stay on because of the love for something.

Yet despite the fact that our class had a horrible reputation, Mrs Wong actually selected to teach our class. FOr that, i guess we owe it to her. Thank you Mrs Wong. WE LOVE YOU <3

End of year woes

So there we go. The end of the very last day of our school year in 2/4 08.It makes me cry just writing about this. WHY? I can't get rid of that heart-wrenching feeling that engulfes me very time I think of what the future may be, what obstacles lie ahead, what challenges we might face. I tried, I REALLY tried to stem the tears which I remember Averil and I just mentioning about the day before, " do you think anyone would cry on the last day, tomorrow?" SIGH. I swore I wouldn't, I shoudn't , I can't cry, but yet I did. I made a list of people I would really miss. NO THEY ARE NOT ALL. But Iam just listng those I've bonded with. Here it is: (in no specific order)

1. Averil( the steadfast, understanding,great councellor,strong-willed:) )
2.Mavis( the sweet, funny, happy,I'll-never-insult-anyone person:) )
3.Shermaine( lollipop-lover,funny, happy-always:) )
4.Estelle( funny, easy-going:) )
5.Chloe(My best neopets buddy! :) )
6.Phyllis(Optimistic, great source of comfort:) )
7.Crystal(Clear as her name suggests, nice, easy-going:) )
8.Stephenie(sweet, understanding:) )

Pls note that I mean well when I write this and don't give me a black eye.

What i remember most about these people:

1.Averil: band, Clarinet, comforter
2.Mavis: haha, Chinese pro, dog-lover
3.Shermaine: AEP, lollipop,guides
4.Estelle: Guides
5.Chloe: Neopets, bowling
6.Phyllis: My p6 friend
7.Crystal: Badminton
8.Stephenie: Red Cross, blog-pro

I can't forget these people. They have played a big role in my life. Not to mention those who annoy me. But Its ok. I forgived you long ago. I remember a song ( sung by Avril Lavigne, My happy ending)

Lets talk this over
its not like we're dead
was it something I did
was it something you said
don't leave me hanging
in a city so dead
held up sp high
on such a breakable thread
you were all I ever thought I knew
and I thought we could be.......

Friends, are just friends, let the good times come.....

It took me some time to start writing something. Its not like I feel like it, but iam feeling subdued. Not that i want to. I was hoping for a holiday better than last year's. but as it turned out, that's not going to be the case. Why is everyone shooting ahead now? Everyone has changed so much, both for the better and the worse. Some used to be so nice, and now they have changed so drastically that should they just wear a mask, I won't even recognise them anymore. Why? I seem to be stuck in this place, like a rat in a trap while all my fellow 'rats' have found a way to escape and have moved on. leaving me, the sad me behind. Thinking about it now, I guess my results were far from ideal. Why do all my close friends do better? Why can't i be up to their level? I don't understand. Next year, will i be so embarassed to meet my friends who are in so much a better class than i am? I can't bear to face the fact that we will all be moving on next year, seemingly to another era. Our relationships which we have so seamlessly sewn together will be ripped apart with such force that we may not even acknowledge each other as friends. I try to think, 'Frens 4 eva!' will remain true to its words, but we all know that friendships may not last and most importantly, FRENS ARE NOT FOREVER!!!!! We must all learn to recognise this. Friends come and go, withour our knowing, we have already lost them.

To top it all, I can only say that I must now face the blatant fact that my results aren't good enough to put me in the same class as my friends this year.

So i can only say this. I hope that this doesnt sound as if Iam losing hope, or if u feel uncomfortable about this, Iam sorry. Averil and Mavis, goodbye friends.

ps. to lighten this message, Iam not going to die. Not yet I hope.

mmmmmmmmfffffffffffffffffffffffffff

Sigh. HAHA ok not a very good way to start. Results are released tmr. Don't frighten me any further by asking any of the teachers how the class did.

Found out we had a new gym comm. today from Sheryl. Yup, a bit late isnt it? I probably wasnt even there for the selection( how do u select anyway?) and a whole new comm is now faced with more responsibilities, people, etc...

Haha ok. I just read Shermaine's blog and she says she wants to 'learn dance'. ok then I'll say. Somehow rhythmic gym appeals to me now. i must be going mad. I don't stick to my CCAs. They're not even related! Ok. lets see...

P1-P2: selected for the rhytmic gym schoolteam. Dunno how I got in. Must be a case of luck. Quit because I did'nt dare to learn the split( which iam trying to now with little success).

P4-P6: Selected for photo and video Society. Met the twins, Xin hui and Xin Ru and Nicolette.

Sec 1: Joined Tramp.Was in school team and didn't know it. So pro right?

Sec2: joined Schoolteam for 2 mths, then quit( don't ask me why)

SIgh....... I learnt this sometime ago but never put it into action: a rolling stone gathers no moss. Should have realised this earlier.

THe dog!:)

Hey. Iam in school now and blogging. HAHAHA:) ok nevermind. better hurry before someone comes;P Here's a picture of my favourite dog:)

A shiba Inu. HAHAHA:)

Iam overly( how ever u spell it) happy. TOo hyper. drank too much milo:D

THanks to www.sxc.hu/photo/738637 whom i found the picture from.

life sucks sometimes!!!!!!!!!!!!

Some people think they are so good when they aren't. They like provoking people when they aren't listening. Its called being kinda cowardly, isn't it? I mean, what's the use of talking to someone when they don't even listen. Sometimes, everyone sees me as the subdued person on the outside. They don't even know what to look out for in a person. ( wipes away angry tears). Its quite annoying when others say," oh all teenagers act like that! ANGRY, MAD AND WEIRD . Just leave them."

As far as i've said, I know only people like us know what Iam talking about. Keep it that way. They say we're immature. Lets show them they are immature too ok?!

;)

Look at the godly hour. Holidays again. Changed my skin again. its called boredom stes in. haha. Ok, my CA results improved from the other time. HAHAHA ok Iam nuts. Lets see if there's still room for improvement. :)

I realise that with our presence in the world, there are some things we cannot change. Some things which we don't want to happen but are beyond our control. Why arewe focusing on these things? We should be focusing on things we have control over. Watching the olympics in Beijing, I've realised that I've learnt more than that some people are pros in certain things. I've learnt that we cant push the blame onto another person when it is clearly our fault. I've learnt that we cant cry over split milk. Its quite heart-wrenching to see our athletes, who compete so hard for Singapore, cry over something when we get the benefit. And there's also something I dont understand. Why are people still insensitive enough to say that our athletes don't preform well because they were competing on their homeland? They were brought up for part of their lives in Singapore. They made Singapore proud. They earned a princely 'income'. Most important of all, they tried their best and are able to realise their full potential. And that is what I think matters the most.

kaes, I havent posted for some time, I know. Hey all of u who were unfortunate enough to witness me being in some sour mood... iam not, not... you know.... er, ok. Lets start my true (current) life story.

Things which annoyed me today:

1st: ran . I was feeling slightly sick. Still ran. i was forced to.
2nd: I had to go for my chinese tuition..Sigh. Was beheaded in class because I forgot the format for formal chinese letter writing( gong han )
3rd: Went for my piano exam practise. The piano was awful.piano exam on Wedbye. watch this show on gymasts..

Come on, where's my guardian angel when I need it?

OMG OMG OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Iam so freaked ok?! I can't believe I did something to an innocent animal!! Sigh...

I was trying to clip my lovebird (Murphy)'s toenails today. Ok, I knew it was very, as in VERY long, and sooner or later, the nails would get caught in the bars of the cage beacuse it was long. Just as I had placed the nail clipper( yes, it shares my nail clipper as well )at the nail, it made this sudden movement, trying to escape. It was when I made a desicion, a very bad desicion to try and clip the nail even if it was moving. Then guess what? I clipped its vein. U see, the nail can only be clipped at the very tip and I accidently clipped it to far. Yes it was squeaking, but it squeaks all the time so I didn't think anything was wrong until I saw like, 2 minute drops of blood on the floor and I thought, ok this is it.



I picked the bird up and realised that the tip of the nail where I had clipped was bleeding. Ok, you're thinking its no big deal. But it was a lot, ALOT of blood, and really, it wouldn't stop. Even after I applied pressure. Someone help.



Ok, then to cut a long story short, its fairly alright now, but I have to treat it like a delicate wind mobile. That means, no flying, no grabbing, no running up and down the inside of my shirt( yes it does that) , no acting like a alien stuck in a overturned plastic bowl, no playing for short.



Last but no least, if anyone knows of any remedies which can help the bird, pls pls pls pls pls....tag me. Iam really desperate, really really am.

birthdays-pains and pleasures

Its funny when they say," many happy returns of the day!" on your birthday. Its like they are wishing that you will only be happy on your birthday, when actual fact is that you should be happy everyday and 'live your life to the fullest'. Thing is, its not human to live like its a 'merry,little land' everyday and we all do feel annoyed or upset some certain day. Sometimes you just don't feel like talking to a certain person, or you just feel snappy when someone talks to you about 'crap' things. See, to err is a human. Some simply don't understand that fact. (eg. i baked a cake and burnt it on my 1st attempt and got a shelling). I don't get it. Others treat you well only on your birthday. What?! i can't be normal on other days?

But sometimes they do bring some good too. Besides the routine of eating cake, gifts, singing the all too familiar' happy birthday to you', you get that good feeling inside that , wow, this only occurs once a year, and you plus an extra candle to that cake. thing is, what really is the significance of the cake etc.? Iam betting that you don just eat a' something floured, baked with yeast- wow ! you get a cake! ' on your birthday. well sure, you don't buy that big a cake on normal days, but surely you eat bread, that's flour and yeast too.

Here's another thing, i refered to days which arent your birthday as' normal days', didnt i? Its like trying to say that having your birthday is abnormal, or should i say, special, if you want the optimistic way. GTG now. Going for AEP at 1.00

Would u call me messy? annoying? weird? wadever....

When u don fit in, u become superhuman. You can feel everybody's eyes on you. stuck like velcro. u can hear a whisper from about a mile away.u can disappear, even when it looks like you're standing rite there. u can scream, and nobody hears a sound.

Isnt it true?

Guess who's with me here? Averil's here. hahahahahaha....

Life is a little complicated rite now. :(

the lovable fly and others

Lets talk about names. My name is (uh) JuLyn. My friends have names like, Averil, Mavis and Divya. Why does it seem as if my name seriously sucks?! i mean, ok, Averil reminds me of a steadfast person who can stand up for her own rights. Mavis reminds me of a sweet girl and a wonderful mum:P. Divya, well, simply reminds me of diva. And my name? Jelly. or maybe julian.or maybe its just a name for people to make fun of. I think of myself as the quiet and weird person who sometimes say the wrong things at the wrong time. By now, u must be thinking ,"but its only a name!" Yes, i know its only a name for crying out loud! but yes, sometimes we act like little hobos and run around the place... Some one give me an english name,somebody, come on!

There's a fly in my room. it wouldnt leave. i did every thing i could to get rid of it. I opened the window. I opened the door. I told it in a sad voice that i was seeing another fly. And as a last, final resort, I shouted at it telling it that the fly i was seeing was much nicer than it. It didnt work. I think others would have thought i was nuts.. I mean, talking to a FLY?!

Best part of my story, there was one horribly glorious time when i suddenly couldnt remember my senior's name. I had to check the year book, believe me, i did. And i couldnt remember what class she was in. sigh.. I cant remember my senior's name. Oops, have i already told that? Well, now u see evidence...

ETC..

Hi. i just read from a book that this girl, sued her parents for the rights to herself, because her parents had her only to save their leukemia-stricken elder daughter. And the best part about all of it is that the parents are living in the same house as their daughter-the one who sued them. Can you imagine? I mean, its not all about just plain suing ( how do u spell that?) but also about respect. Would u go around doing the very same thing that she has done? I think.... not.. Iam not actually done with the book yet. Rushing to finish it because I want to start on the other books, by the same author.

i just so happened to watch part of a show about someone called Ellen or something.The show's quite funny, and I deduce it is pretty popular from what i found out- its screened 3 times a day. Anyone knows what its about? ( not u Mavis, i know u only watch Korean dramas *haha. :) K anyway but it was interviewing some celebraties, or maybe so, cos i don recognise some like- a 5 year old child swinging a hula-hoop? Never heard....Funny... HAHAHAHA

K.. oh ya, I quit schoolteam for tramp. Apart from me feeling a bit out of place( due to the people being better than i am), I think things are going to be a bit more.. light from now on, not forgetting the fact that i just lost my opportunity to be in the competition. Its still weired though, takes a bit more getting used to.

I want to colour my life:D

.... Nothing to say.......

Sigh. Its been a long time since i last posted, but after all, things were uneventful, except for the receiving of the report book, which i did like--------- but then again, i dunno some people failed like, 3 to 4 subjects and yet their class position is higher.... unfair. Averil u did so well la, such a high position in class, and level too. I dunno what to say, the holidays are here but i don think iam going to get much rest because i know that iam going to be bugged about the fact that i didnt do as well as i should.

Good for you Laura, coming in 1st in class.your parents must be proud of you.

I think, WHat do you expect, a medal? fits here.

Oh ya,my MSN isnt working, anyone has any bright ideas on how to fix it?

Last of all.... DOn ask me how i did cos iam not going to tell, it doesnt matter who you are, unless those who already know blab..........

A new skin. see what you think of it.

What do u expect, a medal?

Ok i think iam becoming too formal. and it isn't the normal me. see iam not particularly overjoyed when the exams are coming rite? how can anyone be? like, i think everything is turning nuts. wait. either iam or the world. More likely the former. And that's the reason why i changed my URL too, except that i came up with it in 2 mins.And What do u expect, A medal? is due to the exams. My new philosophy. Iam not wonderful in math, chinese, lit, you name it. and i don think i will excell, either. i cant even consider that iam SUPER good in art too cos my AEP teacher is worried for me. sigh. how sad can the world become. Its raining. Rian falls on the just and the unjust.

What do u do when u have to do it?

PFT 5 items tomorrow. I dunno how i'll fair, like, i suck at so many things, sit and reach( cos iam not flexible at all) , standing broad jump, and sit ups. Ok, i MAy be good in 2.4 but here's my weak point ppl.. I don want to spoil it too early.

Wore FBt's today, for HHF. 1st time iam wearing cos the previous week I've always been worrying, about what exactly i dunno.. No idea.I don dare to wear them for gym. maybe iam just being paranoid. Believe it or not but iam actually afraid of people commenting. Imagine.

EP is done, well at least most done. ALL MY PROJECTS ARE OVER!!!! YAY!!!!!!!! lol. i think iam a bit too overjoyed, alright i still have to do my math and chinese so I shall not be lazy and get it done!....

PFT stuff and more

Had my PFT 2.4 km run/walk today.. yup, actually iwouldnt really consider it a walk, since i ran all the way, with my eyes becoming blurer my the minute.... I ran the 1st few rounds with Tessa, and she ran ahead of me the 1st few.. but had to stop adn tie her hair because her hairtie was coming out.. Actually the teachers did allow us to carry a music player with us to try and boost us on. i think some people would have benifitted, but I didnt, and i didnt even have a music anyway, so it outta point. The starting of the run had just as much tension as any race, except we all know this is must longer, so i could see people dropping out from running and walking the rest of the way. Actually, I hadnt even the faintest idea of how fast i was running until i realise that towards the end of the run, that only 10 minutes had passed. I was on my 10th round then. And the people around me( esp. Mavis) was telling me to 'go go go' and 'eh, u very fast leh! ' then i realised. But anyway, my timing was only 12min 16sec for 12 rounds... so so la....

STOP IT KELLY!!!!!!!!! and..

STOP IT KELLY!!!!!!!!!! STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!

I forgive you if u start to think iam nuts. I thought i was going to go nuts( out of pain and embarasement) when kelly started drawing on my hand like she thought it was paper!! I cant believe i let her draw... maybe i was too soft la, but.....what do i do when she's giving me a choice?, not a choice as to whether she could draw or not, but to WHAT she wanted me to draw. I said i didnt want any graffiti but she said " No u take one hurry up" I maintained that i didnt want but she gave me a look and would u believe it, i gave in.

Next: I expected a small one. No i didnt, well not really. Kelly is kelly. :) she will do what she wants. the picture took up my whole arm. I shouted" kelly what are u doing?!" and she calmly said "drawing." during lesson time. Iam still shocked the teacher didnt hear.I think i was horrified cos i remember screaming" kelly i have gym later!!!! "........ sigh but nvn la at least she didnt write in permenant ink.....

Next issue: I think it was the worst argument i've ever had with my friends. what over? THE DUMB STUPID EP PROJECT!!!!!!!! THe schedule was to come to my house to finish filming th scene but a squabble broke up once we realised that we had no time. Then the real thing started......HOw embarassing.we had to meet the EP teacher and...that when some of us couldnt take the stress and started crying.... no, not me...not yet i mean.

we went for chinese after that. After the inccident, do u think anyone could concentrate on anything the teacher was saying? NO, duh.and we wen tback to class, and the argument started again, after the momentary halt. That's when things started to get even worse and..well one more person left the room with red eyes.... I had to go for gym later, more afraid people would see so i kept to myself most of the time.... I couldnt even close the tramp properly, i let go of the metal bar when we were not supposed to, and of course the whole tramp fell with a terrific bang...ya. I heard the coach say" yi hou bu rang ta zuo ba." which means,'don let her do next time' Embarrasing......hai. very sian la...rrrr

nature

I dunno what we're doing here but everyone looks good except me cos my eyes are shut...yahaha

pictures

From the top( Divya, Ju Lyn Averil, Mavis)

The fun we had..

Here we go-the impossible mission of the phycological brain power. The memorising of long notes in a night...
What choice do i have anyway? Since the deadline of our english is crazily near(ie. tomorrow!!) We will just have to slog it out.yeah i mean it literally. I havent don like,practically everything, treatment for a lazy eye, water( 2litres),homework, memorising...etc.. I still have a pile of tuition homework to do..

hopefully averil and co. will be coming over to my house on tuesday. sigh but ya i mean, We have to do a project rite? And it isnt our fault that the stupid video camera had to conk out on us rite? what about the other things, like : me falling off averil's aerobic ball and hurting myself really badly(i have the bruise to prove it but iam not showing u cos,well), the ruination(no such word) of the whole video cos i simply laughed too much, me getting a muscle ache thanks to the many tuck jumps i tried on averil's trampoline... etc. (Watch it i said etc, which means there are more) but ya, i don want to be so negative...

Iam dead. Well i think iam.And my brain's going to burst from all the words..
Quote: failing to plan is planning to fail.

MF... Mixed feelings

hi i dunno why i didnt post for such a loooooooong time but still,I don planto give up on this too fast so.... science project is coming up,no actuall we're late in handing in i think, we're not even through 1/2 way... and I cant write properly now... I dunno why... Maybe its a weird case of feeling-tipsy-without-drinking-wine...

.......

I hope things change luh. Its like, SO EMBARASSING!!!! U know u ok, seriously suck at gym and the last thing u want is to have your good friend looking at you...rite? It doesnt really apply if ur good, but if u suck, like me, then its not a good idea to be stared at.:S well..not really stare la, Divya was pretty nice, she saw i was already having problem with the basic one (or called the Straight Jump) . I kept wavering off to the side of the tramp and i didnt catch my senior when she fell off...hai. I seriously felt like crap then la! I mean i don think i can gain the trust of my friends anymore to catch them when they fall off.. cos of, of what happened.

GIve me a chance la, PLS!!!!

More stuff...

Mavis! why did u have to be sick?! Ok la, sorry, I can't blame her. she can't -want to be sick. Well maybe she does, for certain reasons...:P Anyway.. I may not want to go for the science camp thingy, cos iam not sure whether Averil is going for the camp, So i don want to be the only one left..ya, problem is, I've handed in the Edusave form and i don think i can withdraw... so...maybe I'll just have to forfeit it... haha, i think laziness is an issue here..But anyway if don go, I'll still have to go for gym so i cant getaway with too much space.

PS.I want FBT shorts!!! Actually i don want it, I sort of, need it or I cant go for gym le,unless i go without shorts, which is..... er

There's so much math homework!!!!!!!! I did 2 total hours of math and i only JUST managed to finish 1 page of the homework. I still have a LOT more homework to do...

friendships...

Maybe i was overdoing things, but i think i overdid things a bit. Science lab was not really good cos I bet everyone felt uncomfortable, even when we're among our own clique. I realise that friendships MAY not last, no matter what postcards say. I oly have 1/2 hour so its a short post.Bye...

The new skin

Yay! A new Skin! this one has a harry potter theme... My previous skin had a silly tagboard which constantly wanted to run away.. so i changed the whole skin after my efforts to aid the problem were futile. :) so anyway, I don think ican put games in here, the skin itself doesnt permit it, so I think I shan't put(I fi can, I will, Of course! )

Hike Photos! :D

Yeah!again, stephenie, Laksa, Averil, Divya ,Mavis and Me! :)

photos of hike

This picture was taken at the start of the hike-from Macritchie Reservoir to Bukit Timah hill. :)

Bukit Timah Summit! Mavis, Stephenie,Lakshmi,Me,Averil and Divya.

This photo was at the starting of the hike. (from left to right) Averil, Mavis, Me, Stephenie. :)

Imagine walking across a dirty mud track with only and electric wire on one side and a deep gorge on the other... shudder at the thought? well,we (2 classes from our level) went for a hike today.It was 16++ km in wilderness(80% of it ) and up Bukit Timah Hill, the summit. It was pretty.....awful and nice too, if u know what i mean. Fortunately for us, we had a ok trainer who (at least) knew the route we were taking...imagine if we didn't. See, the route was hard and full of poth holes in places u least expect. I still remember having to dig my fingers into the mud to try to keep a firm foothold on the slippery mud. To put it across more bluntly, I Didn't know the school would organise things like these for us. I mean, one wrong move and your dead and gone. Just like a good team should, we made silly mistakes,squabbled, and stuff etc... all in all, some of the most memorable moments were:
-how every one rushed for water.
-how we had to climb up a steep mud wall to get to our destination
-how some monkeys did a good job of delaying our group
-how we saw something really really sick...
-and how we took photos at the summit of Bukit Timah Hill to prove it. (i dont have the photos with me now cos only Divya had a camera and she's offline so she cant email it over.)

Yup, that's more of less what we did today, actually, the most distinct reminder of our trip are our aching legs. :)

GYm is hard work...but fun stuff :)

Hi, Its good if u can get here, Iam changing my URL all the time so people who just wan to keep track of me find it harder to do so.Anyway, THe math is killing me, I cant get the concept of the whole matter and the a,b,c,d....IS SO hard ot grasp! We had conditioning for gym today, and its wasnt too bad..I mean i paired up with the B division captain... I probably din even have the strength to sit on her properly, I could see she was having really hard time trying to do with me as a partner, Maybe i should gain some weight. :) IT was easy on her though, I was light enough, But ya, sorry if i didnt do a great job of it all... Its ok partnering her, really.

Iam planning to put a password on this blog just like the blog-pro Stephenie.. So that I feel more relaxed about writing stuff just in case( IN CASE ) i offend people by accident. If i have, I am seriously sorry..ya..ok I GTG now..Bye :)

THe problems with stuff

Hi!
Ok. Lets take a vote. Who thinks i should stay in gym?
WHo thinks i shouldnt?

Okay seriously there's just too many things to do without already having to post, but still here I am,I know i havent posted for quite a long time so...... Anyway Iam still unsure as to whether i Should quit gym... Cos its a pretty difficult time for me in there... Even if i should quit , what can i join anyway? I think some people think i pulled string to get into Schoolteam, which is like, so not true cos I wasnt even thinking of getting into schoolteam anyway...It came as such a shock even weeks later Iam still feeling the aftermath of the whole incident... I wish the other people who are far better than me would understand, Its like i don even feel part of my own CCA! I hope the others in gym arent thinking iam too aloof to be friends with them. I really wan to be but i just can't seem to fit in! Its like, A square peg in a round hole..

As the saying goes, ' 50% of the people usually like u, but 50% do not' Its the same in gym, maybe not really, cos I really want my friends to accept me in... but....... I really envy the my friends (both in gym and otherwise) that they can be so natural in what they are doing...Its like a fish and a house, they don get along, not resemblence.

But anyhow, If i quit, all i've been doing is going to go down the drain.. Some people really think its only the CCA points which matter... they don even understand that there's more to the whole CCA matter?!

Change of blogskin

Hi, I think u know la, I've changed my blog skin, and now Iam having trouble putting in the games... :( and even worse, i cant link ppl! i've been trying real hard, but iam given a time limit here and i cant seem to get the links and the games working... sigh maybe its was my fault...I shouldnt have changed the blogskin...maybe that's why iam regretting now... i know the post i short la, but i cant think of anything else now... so see u ppl and all the best for the tests next week! :)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AVERIL!!!

Hi people! haha i cant believe iam online at this time...no one's online, and i cant blame them either cos its really very late... haha 1.10am. and i really have to say, HAPPY BIRTHDAY AVERIL!! MANY HAPPY RETURNS OF THE DAY!!! :D we're going to celebrate AVeril's birthday at macdonald's tomorrow where we can discuss our group project at the same time. And i cant believe it, Its a blessing in disguise when Total defence day fell on AVeril's birthday celebration with the class. Mavis, Averil and i shared the brownie for recess... HAHa that was really nice of her since it was her brownie, her birthday, her desicion to give us the cake and her desicion to give me too since i had gym later on anyway... :D so...

happy bday to u, happy bday to u,
happy bday to AVERIL,
happy bday to u!

May the good Lord bless u, May the good Lord bless u,
May the good LOrd bless AVERIL,
MAy the good lord bless u...

If i got the words wrong pls tell me... k? thanks! :)

Pic

This is another photo taken for fun( literally) ya but its looks pretty ok so... :)

Math homework...Loads

Hi people... iam really bored... haha and actually, what would you really expect if we are given math homework everyday? Except for Friday cos there's no math,we have Math everyday and ima almost swimming in my homework! :-S and i think gym is really starting ot bite... i want to join in with the people adn really, well, be like one of them but i don think its really going ot work cos iam too...quiet. Oh ya, i don know if you remember but i wrote about '2 people who made use of me' in case some people are starting ot get suspicious, its really not about anyone who consider themselves my friends. sigh. I can't believe it la, Mavis has decided to come to school early! :D At least now i don have to stay in school in the morning alone now...haha. AEP homework also a lot la, I really envy u peopple who aren't in AEP and don have to work on self and group projects!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AVERIL!!!!!!:) (16th Feb )

This photo was taken by Kim...haha... I know i look a bit...(silly?) here but... :D

Popiah party

Hi everyone! Iam currently using my aunt's computer at her house for a popiah party... and its good( at least better than mine) cos my ALWAYS lags...Seriously. ANyway...Iam wiht me good friend here now.. Natalie,or Nat as i call her. Haha i can't believe that i met her along the same path cos I went to my aunt's church for balloon sculpturing. LOL and i really really REALLY want to go to church!!!!! :D Her sis, Natasha is aso ok la.. She kinda cute ( HAHa) and funny... LOL Anyway i GTG now cos i don wan to hold up the com for too long...HAHA :)

Going visiting + a special edition of someone whose's smart

Hey people! Iam really not supposed to be here la... We;re supposed to be leaving (going visiting) in like a few minutes time! haha...But my cousin is still feeding the dog..which is ok,i guess, they are taking the dog with us and it's a long time ..so we don want the dog to go hungry!( Snowy's nice) and ya, iam talking to my cousin JJ Sarah now so... i cant believe we're going to have dinner later! ok, it sure sounds like iam low on food or something, but no la, its just that we hardly see each other and now's a great time for a reunion... so i really hope we can make the best out of what we do!

A sad fact: I dunno whether anyone has like, really REALLY REALLY smart cousins who did so well in school that i look like a beggar compared to a king( u get it) HOW?! its driving me up the wall, Iam telling u! Does anyone even empathise (however u spell) with the not-so-smart cousin?! Ok, let's be real. My Cousin is not only super nice, she's smart. I wish i just had a tiny portion of the really smart brain, to at least show that i am made of something! AM i really good at something? i dunno...... Iam going to be dead..there's test after test after test!!!!!!! AhHHHHH! :(

My Cousin, Her dog, And the new year...

Hi everyone and a happy new year again! :) There's a lot to do during new year always. Like today, We went round to relatives houses( collecting angpaos in the process) and had pretty much of a good time... cos i always enjoy going to my cousin's house, JJ.rah. SHe's pretty nice but a bit quiet..haha so am i think..anyway, She has a nice Shih Tzu dog whose name is Snowy( or Snowey) and Its also very 'licky' u know what i mean la. :) Andway i had a whale of a time eating lots of food and drinks(coconut which was a bit hard but that happened to be an exceptional) and all sorts of other stuff.. u know the usual during new year. I wasnt wearing red..(haha i don wan to look like a angpao just yet) and I suppose everyone else in the community also had their fair share of the once-a-year excitement.

But for my case, Its was far from over when we returned home. I had to endure,like, 37 mins fo TOTAL NON-STOP RUNNING!!!!!!! I thnk its a bit nuts la, but since its my dad who makes me run i cant say anything...... :( NVN la its always over in the end...so... AGain,wishing everyone a prosperous and blessed new year ahead!!!! :D

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR TO ALL!!!!!!! :)

Heys! :) HAppy Chinese New Year everyone! Its so cool to see everyone dressed up in red, or in pink walking around in the streets looking just like a huge angpao. Not really, in some cases people think Its way too funny to look 'cute' at this point in time and so they wear jeans... LOL! I am being dragged to go visiting this new year... again...and this chinese new year is special for me. Its a way things turn out, the fact that everyone is taliking about this red year and how this year is going to turn out the best...blah blah blah.. they say that every year and there always turns out ot have some crisis later on in the year, like in 2004,we had the sars... LOL..

SOrry iam being lame la, its cos my relatives are here and lunch is not ready so ... u know iam starting ot get bored.. and lame at the same time. I think i don have training for gym.. but i do know that there's conditioning on Monday for all (schoolteam) members so ya la...

BTW, iam still feeling a little shocked that i got into schoolteam.. iam like the worst now! What to do... I badly wanted to join the band but they don accept sec 2s... but its really ok la, I just want the gym people to be a little bit more friendly.. Iam just quiet cos that's my nature! No one can really expect me to talk the head off a horse in someplace i don really know rite?! Of course iam not blaming the gym people, they may think that iam just unfriendly cos i don wanna talk, but that's so not true! My true friends know that.. and i hope more people will too...

Also, HAPPY BIRHTDAY AVERIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:)

Mavis and her deleted Blog :'(

(SOb*) Mavis!!!! WHy did u delete your blog?! u know what i really loved it u know! And just because u ruined your skin doesnt men that u have to delete it! MAVis!!!! ok, ppl i think u are beginning to think that Iam nuts la just because Mavis deleted her blog Iam practically going crazy! Some background knowledge u'd like to know about why iam so nuts... Mavis was pretty kind to me( helping me to create my blogskin and all) and she created it to get me going. I wish she would re create, but i have to admit if i force her( i WOnt, Don worry !) she won be too happy and so would i. Anyway, WHy am i screaming?! Its a perfectly free world...Goodness.. iam beginning to think iam talking ot myself , myself between two different feelings..Yeah i sure am beginning to feel a little freaked out myself( No wonder Samantha(Sam) finds me freaky/weird/wadever! ) sigh...HIstory test coming... and i DIN bring back my textbook!! iam so unsure of myself even la... Help is what i need..really!!!!!

Things About things...

Yeah i got my cbox back!! Yahoo! haha i know iam lame but its not really easy to contain how u feel if u've been wanting something very much for a seriously long time! ( if i were to get something really nice like Averil's wallet, i would probably scream and shout and hit the roof! Seriously! i love her wallet THAT much ... LOL )ok, lets see, When's history test? monday? too bad i din bring my textbook back anyway...... And rite now Mavis i MSNing me like crazy... She really nice la, so i don mind... but if someone i din like triend to take advantage...well...

Oh Help!!!!!!:(

Oh Great!!! THere goes my Tagboard again! Where exactly we supposed to copy and paste our cbox code to? ( i know its inside the HTML box but where and which line exactly?) I really feel like punching this thing la, its annoying me to death! What with the amount of practise i have for gym rite now... Its ok really! i cant escape from it although training is tough...i really wish people in gym would understand me though.. I really feel stressed in gym sometimes... cos i think iam simply expecting too much of myself... everyone else had a year of training and i only have 3 weeks?! Why doesnt anyone understand me through my tears... iam shy cos iam new, embarassed cos iam not as good as the others, alone cos no one really talks and stressed cos i cant get used to this new enviornment!

ARHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hiya ppl, iam seriously pissed rite now cos my whole message (really really long) just got deleated smack like that! i really cant be bothered to write such a long one again so bye!!!!!!!!!!! :@

The amazing Science and Geog test... Not

Hiya u ppl! i just recreated this blog( Thanks to my dear friend Mavis ) and its pretty ok so far except for the fact that there is no tagboard , which is considered pretty bad la, cos i think the tagboard is most important here. sigh we had an awful Geog and science test today and the effect was bad. I mean i find it ok for science, but i don think Science was too good. Cos our teacher told us that we were supposed to memorise the chemical formula and my friends and i ( ok, Averil, Mavis and Divya )all memorised ONLY yhe chemical formula and u can guess la, when the test paper came out our eyes practically bulged out.(well i dunno about the others, but i DO know mine did) cos i din't have much idea on What to write! That was only like, the start of the whole nightmare. I got so tense that i started perspiring on the spot and found it hard to breathe. My mind went"Blank!" and although i worked pretty hard to get those formulae into my head, i could remember simple stuff like what Pb2+ was, and it was the easiest one to remember! Do u? (ok, its actually Lead).

THe rest of the test passed pretty much in a blur, and i stayed back for a while to study with Mavis( Or rather,work on this blog in the computer lab). I think i don have to mention the teacher in charge of the library( to save my aching fingers, lets call this teacher TCL). She one kind of a person u really wouldnt like to meet. She's got a forever upturned mouth and this small ,beady eyes made even smaller by her large owl glasses. (haha) . iam pretty frightened by my discipline mistress too. She's a little like a time bomb mixed with a enraged rhinoceros... Its seriously no joke. What would u do if u met an enraged rhinoceros? climb up a tree and stay there till she passes? i would. No one, in the right state of mind, would want to meet her in an annoyed state. well, i guess she sure does her job well as a discipline mistress, she rules the school with an iron fist.

Anyway, iam seriously bored now( i bet u can tell from the way iam rattling on) anyone who managed to read to this point of my blog entry withour falling asleep is really,truly a genius! sigh... :) Ps, THis is my longest,ever writen blog! Yahoo!! :)